You are Worth Dying For

In his book Sex God: Exploring the endless connections between sexuality and spirituality (affiliate link), Rob Bell gives advice to young women when they consider whom they will date.

He suggests a few questions to ask. Questions whose answers will help them decide how the man in question really feels about them. Whose answers will help them catch a glimpse of what a future together might look like.

Whose answers will help them decide if the man is really in love with her. And not just any love, but the kind of love that leads to death.

Bell asks:

If you’re dating someone, what kind of man is he?
Does he demonstrate that he’s the kind of man who would die for you?
What is his posture toward the world?
Does he serve, or is he waiting to be served?
Does he believe that he is owed something, that he has been short changed, that he’s gotten the short end of the stick, that life owes him something?
Or is he out to see what he can give?
Does he see himself as being here to make the world a better place?

The assumption in all of the questions is that she, and all other people, are worth dying for. Because Jesus did. God became with us. And then loved so much, that he died for us.

You are worth dying for.

Once we understand that we are worth dying for, we can die to ourselves. Once we realized how much we are loved, we can love others.

The questions are not only useful for women, but for all of us. Because the answers can help us decide if we are living a better story.

• What kind of person am I?
• How do I view and relate to everyone else in the world?
• Do I expect people to do things for me?
• Or do I find opportunities to do things for others?
• Do I feel that I deserve everything I have? Do I feel that I deserve more?
• Or do I give what I have to those who don’t have?
• How do I make the world a better place? Do I want to make the world a better place?
• Do I have anyone in my life I would die for?

The fun part of these questions is that we don’t have to have all the correct answers. Life isn’t a quiz. Life isn’t a test to see if we can get it right. God isn’t the teacher who is waiting to see if we pass or fail.

God loves you regardless of your answers. There is no ruler in his hand, only love and outstretched arms.

But life is an opportunity. An opportunity to experience this love. And then an opportunity to love others in the same way.

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